Monday, August 18, 2008 • 12:00 AM Comments ()

PROOF: Bigfeet have advanced dental technology!

posted by James Heflin

Take a look here at our largefoot friend:

Pardon me, but, as I told my friend Earl earlier, that fellow has a really good set of choppers. Could he have naturally acquired such teeth? I think not!

I am therefore announcing my own major find: Bigfeet not only exist, they have really good Bigfeet dentists. I think this photo clearly shows that, and I don't think anybody can disprove it. And that's the basis of science after all--those white-coated know-it-alls not being able to disprove stuff I come up with in my spare time.



UPDATE: Earl has just phoned me, and I have egg on my face, friends. Earl tells me (now he tells me! Thanks Earl!) that he knew this Bogfoot, and so did his Aunt Pearl in Valdosta. When the hairy man had tooth trouble, Aunt Pearl gave him her old false teeth. Her new ones had her name spelled out in front with stick-on diamonds, so she was pretty much done with the old pair.

But I think it's also clear from this photo that Bigfeet live in freezers, and I don't think even Earl has an answer for that one. Forget these forest expeditions--let's all go check what's underneath the frost and get this Bigfoot business solved once and for all.

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